I fell in love. Strongly. I love him so much. Unfortunately, that means attachment, and I have finally understood, the teachings of life when people say to live freely and unattached. When I fell in love, I lost control. When I was just enjoying, that was the best of times. However, I fell in love, and I haven’t found the balance of control. As a person who never felt love before in life, even with peers, it was easily to get attached, once I had been hooked on. Once, I had lost. Now he has control, and it was never like that. I enjoyed being on the other side – to be in control, and even worse to submit to His control which he cannot handle his power and even understanding. Secondly, other than being previously unloved, I also have never been a forward kinda girl. In recent times, I have been pushed, in certain situations to become more in control. Especially that. He. Does. Not. Understand. it takes much difficultly to become even the ounce of confidence he has. To tell someone with anxiety disorder or something of the like to act ‘normal’, and say it’s disrespectful,….shame on you.
Final note : I may seem like a tiny ant to you, but ants are one of the strongest creatures.
A toast to love. And may I forever be stronger quick enough for you not to leave me or to see that I have pushed myself, however smallest. Por favor. I have. I have…..and if you don’t see, that you don’t know me well