Respect

I have a high moral compass. And I’ve always thought I was / am a respect person….until I met my boyfriend. He has taught me a lot, and I dont doubt him in all the knowledge he has and especially the love he feels for me.

He asks me for respect. Something so simple, and so humane. Something I thought I have, yet in the eyes of my boyfriend, I have failed him.

It annoys me. It annoys me becuase I want to be his perfect. And everything that I have lived for, seems a lie. That I have worked enough, that no matter how good I think I am, being polite and helpful and kind and loving etc, I’m missing, I’m missing that tiny bit.

I’ve failed the person, the only person I love most in the world (my parents are no longer here), and I feel a failure.

I. Will. Not. Stop. Trying.

No matter how little your think, Everytime I do something, that you do not see. Because you are not me, you do not feel the self of accomplishment I feel, no matter How small. I will continue to progress! I will not be belittled!!

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